Is the New Bond a Dud?

We were shaken and stirred to our very foundations by this horrifying report by The Daily Mail about the goings-on at the press conference to announce that blondie Daniel Craig is the new James Bond.

It was the sort of tricky situation that James Bond would have defused in a second. Daniel Craig, on the other hand, didn't have the benefit of a witty script. Or even a little wit. At a press conference to unveil him as the sixth 007 he made a less than suave impression when asked who he would prefer as a Bond Girl - Kate Moss or Sienna Miller. For a man said to have had both in his little black book, he might at least have ventured a reply. Instead he shifted in his seat uncomfortably before muttering: "I'm not going to get into that."

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Later there was not a hint of Bond's unruffled approach to pressure when a US TV reporter asked him again about Miss Miller. Craig turned the air blue with expletives.

All in all, it wasn't the most auspicious of starts for the 37-year-old actor, who beat off rivals including Orlando Bloom, Ewan McGregor and Colin Farrell to play the spy on Her Majesty's secret service. Craig had obviously decided against playing up to the part as he arrived at the press conference on the HMS President at St Katharine's Dock in East London. The producers may have been hoping for a dashing entrance as he zipped up on a Royal Marines speedboat. But Craig's suit looked more banker than spy. Add to that his carefully-fitted lifejacket and the way he clung for dear life to the rail, and Bond he wasn't.

In fact, he admitted the experience had 'scared the s*** out of me'.

Riding in a motorboat "scared the sh**" out of James Bond? And what was with the attack of Tourette's Syndrome when reporters asked about his affairs with Sienna Miller and Kate Moss? Now, picture Pierce Brosnan sailing through the same interview with witty, Bondian rejoinders. Yes, it's all too clear, isn't it?