Apparently Los Angeles is being attacked by some sort of black, tarry killer goo.
Los Angeles officials were still scratching their heads today over what caused a mysterious black goo to burble from streets downtown, forcing the evacuation hundreds of apartment dwellers.
A Los Angeles Fire Department spokesman said investigators had yet to identify the "black tarry substance" more than 24 hours after it erupted at Olive Street and Pico Boulevard.
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About 200 residents were forced to flee as a hazardous materials team and dozens of firefighters worked throughout the day to identify what was first deemed "a black tarry substance" and later morphed into a "watery mud."
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Firefighters were alerted at 3 a.m. by complaints of a sewer-like smell at an apartment house at 1220 S. Olive St. near Pico Boulevard, but found nothing.
They returned at 1 p.m. to find a Slimer-like ooze lurking beneath central Los Angeles.
"We were called back because there was a gooey substance, a tarry-type substance, coming out the underground electrical vaults, out of manhole covers in the street, through the sidewalks and possibly in one older apartment building," Myers said.
A 120-foot stretch of Olive buckled 1 1/2 feet, he said. The pre-1933 unreinforced masonry apartment building shifted one foot from its foundation. Sidewalks were as hot as Jacuzzis.
And a pressurized liquid shot from every street orifice located above what used to be a historic oil field downtown.
No one was injured in what amounted to a black lagoon. Hazmat and Urban Search and Rescue crews determined that the mysterious substance wasn't flammable, Myers said.
"Incident commanders are evaluating some form of drilling operation one or two blocks away as the possible cause," he added.
Well, was it from the drilling operation or is it the black tar aliens from The X-Files that you could see in people's eyes? Because the black tar aliens are actually kind of cool -- so long as they don't take us over, of course.
