Lindsay pulls no punches on the album, subtitled Raw, when she gets to the topic of Michael Lohan, currently serving a four-year prison term for multiple crimes, including driving while intoxicated and assault. He's already the focus of the first single, "Confessions of a Broken Heart (Daughter to Father)," in which she questions if he ever loved her (see "Lohan To Direct Video For Song About Her Family Drama"), but she also berates him in "My Innocence" for allegedly stealing her childhood away. "You broke me in with your mistakes," she sings. "Thanks for the breakthrough." Still, she vows to be resilient and says she's more independent because he wasn't there to look after her.

Next on Lindsay's list are lost loves — those who sent her mixed messages ("A Little More Personal") or cast her aside for another woman too carelessly ("If You Were Me"). She mourns one in "Black Hole," getting paper cuts re-reading old love letters, realizes another was a bad fit two years too late in "If It's Alright," but saves her venom for the one she wishes were as "desperate and dying inside" as the way he made her feel in "I Live for the Day": "I live for the tears to fall down your face."

Lindsay is more dimensional than just a woman scorned, though — she's also questioning her life as a star, which might be "A Beautiful Life" but that doesn't stop her from feeling worn out. She prays to God because sometimes she just doesn't know who else would listen, or if she dares let them: "I talk in my sleep/ That's the one place I know no one can hear me." And she realizes the incongruity of wishing people would care when she doesn't let them in the first place. On "Fast Lane" she sings, "So I drive around this superficial town/ With a smile on my face/ No one really knows how I feel inside/ And I'm keeping it that way."

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How to Make a Felt Donut

That donut in the photograph on the right looks like a delicious donut with lots of calories but it is really just a felt donut. The instructions for how to make one of your own can be found a forum on the Craftster.org website. The instructions include lots of tucking and stitching and stuffing.

Turn the donut right sides out.
Now to sew the donut hole closed....
Turn a couple of tabs in at a time and whip stitch them closed, just like when your done stuffing something and you close the opening. Just tuck, stitch, tuck, stitch... easy as...pie.

Now stuff your donut, I like to use the end of a pen to get my stuffing in good and tight. Now's the time to add potpourri or other smelly stuff if you want your donut to smell yummy. Whip stitch opening closed.

If you scroll through the thread on the Crafster.org forum you can see lots of other felt donuts that were created. We aren't sure why people are making felt donuts but it seems harmless enough. (Via J-Walk)

Posted on November 4, 2005
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Bush Has Nothing in His Pockets

The Argentinian people have enquiring minds. And what they really want to know about President Bush before he visits their country this week is the answer to the burning question: what does the leader of the free world carry in his pockets? Apparently, not much.

President Bush may be burdened with the world's problems, but his pockets are pretty light. It turns out the leader of the free world doesn't have to worry about carrying all the essentials of the common man.

Bush revealed the contents of his pockets Tuesday to an Argentine newspaper reporter who was interviewing him in advance of a presidential trip to Latin America later this week. When the reporter from La Nacion asked Bush to show him what he carries, the president stood up, fished in his pockets, then dramatically pulled his hands out holding nothing but a white handkerchief that he waved playfully in the air.

"Es todo," Bush told the Spanish-speaking reporter, meaning the handkerchief was all. "No dinero, no mas. No wallet." He doesn't need any cash, since his staff takes care of buying anything he might need. He carries no cell phone, either, since he is surrounded by aides who take care of dialing his calls. And why would he need keys since every door is held open for him and his car comes with a driver trained by the Secret Service?

The Argentine reporter, who interviewed Bush at the White House with other journalists from the Latin American media, asked the president if he even had a watch. "Si, Timex," Bush said, thrusting out his wrist to show off a timepiece that had his middle initial, W, on the face. "But I'm not supposed to be endorsing products."

Timex? President Bush wears a Timex with a big W on it? Can that really be right? What kind of style image is that going to send to the Argentinian people? This is just embarrassing.

Posted on November 3, 2005
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Jessica Simpson and the Therapist

All those rumors and reports that Jessica Simpson and Nick Lachey are getting a divorce have apparently really gotten to Jessica. She tells Teen People that she's been seeing a therapist to deal with the stress.

"Yes I have," the singer-actress tells Teen People in its December-January issue, on newsstands Friday. "I respect knowledge of the psyche. I would be a therapist if I weren't an entertainer." Jessica, 25, posed for the cover of the magazine with her sister, Ashlee. Both talk about the difficult challenges of the past year.

Jessica, who had a starring role in The Dukes of Hazzard movie this summer, has been the queen of the tabloids this year — much of the coverage dissecting the marriage of the Newlyweds couple. The pair have denied persistent rumors of a split. "Hopefully mine and Nick's story will continue for the rest of our lives, like what we vowed, through sickness and in health."

Ashlee, 21, recently released her second album, I Am Me, and it debuted at the top of the charts. But she has still had to live down her embarrassing lip-synch disaster on Saturday Night Live last year. "Yeah I messed up in front of everybody," she says. (Last month, Ashlee revisited the scene of her musical flub, performing on SNL— really live, this time.) However, she adds: "I love to sing. It's a joy to me. I don't do it for anyone else — I do it for me."

Ashlee sounded fine on SNL -- guess those proton pump inhibitors are really working for her.

Posted on November 2, 2005
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The Iranian Police and the Alluring Mannequins

The Morals Police (and that's not a joke, that's really what they do) in Iran have decided that plastic mannequins are "too alluring" and are forbidden. Towards that end, the police in Northeastern Iran have been raiding women's clothing stores and absconding with the mannequins (65 have been impounded so far).

We think that the fact that these guys find mannequins "too alluring" says more about their own unusual proclivities than the morals of the women who shop at those stores. Or, perhaps the 1987 Kim Catrall movie, Mannequin, has just made its way to Iranian pay-per-view and has incited a million unseemly mannequin fantasies.

Newsflash: the mannequins aren't going to turn into Kim Catrall, and Iranian women aren't going to be happy about this.

Posted on November 1, 2005
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